JOY

Copping with heartbreak, disappointment, failure, dispare and worries...
Each of these are blocks of bricks that you must jump over in order to reach the finishing line. It is SO MUCH MORE of a success when you use time and effort to finish the race in a strong LEAP!!
When you feel like EVERYTHING is going wrong, or you feel down and can't get back up.. Every freakin person goes through these once in awhile. I say....just accept the fact that life isn't 100% perfect !!!
If you feel sad one day, one GREATER day is waiting ahead of you!!
I think when people start to just focus on the negative in life...than life for them with will be negative. But feelling postive and thinking the best way possible is what makes life GREAT.

Have faith that things can go apsolutly AMAZING.

The best part of living is not knowing whats next, and the JOY of happiness that floats around like a ring around you where ever you go...

Beliefs

My Belief in God can be different than your belief.
My belief in what will happen when we die may be the total oppisite of what your thinking !
My belief in gay rights or premarital sex or abortion or WHATEVER, may be wrong to YOU, but through my eyes, i see it as I believe and everyone has their own opinion to throw out.

Is it wrong to have premarital sex??? I belive its not wrong to have intercourse before mariage...Only wrong before love.
In the bible it may say its wrong, but im not a bible readin kind of girl.
I have to belive in God.
I'm not that much of a religous person but I pray and love the Lord as do any other.

What will happen when our mission in life is over!??? O^O
No one knows for sure, and even if they claim they do... they DONT.
There are many theories rouming around though..
1) Heaven and Hell
2) Reincarnation
3) LIGHTS OUT

I personaly WANT to believe in reincarnation ... and that everyone gets several chances at life as a new form!! Only..the numbers dont add up right because through the years, millions of more babies are born and back then, there were much less people so it doesnt make sense that old souls have rekindered into new ones... :/

And the theory that most people believe in is HEAVEN or HELL.
I want to believe in that one too :) Maybe more than reincarnation because when i think about my Lola who passed away 2 years ago, i ALWAYS think of her as a beautiful, young woman with long hair wearing a long, white dress, dancing in the Heaven clouds above with Lolo by her side <3 I love to think that a soul is for eternity and that life after death is just a new journey that lasts forever.

BUT, sadly to say....... Lights out seem more of the true outcome :/ (I hope its not.)


Do you believe in gays having the right to be together???
What kind of question is that!??! Of course they have the right!
Love is blind and between 2 people that love eachother. Man and Woman. Man and Man. Or Woman ans Woman. It doesnt matter AT ALL. It shouldn't matter to ANYONE.


SIGH.. Anyway, I'm just sick of people who want to change someones belief because "the bible says so"
Being 100% true to yourself is something worth living for...
The bible can only make you happy for so long until someone taps you on the shoulder and makes you move out of their way.

Diaries are a girls best friend !!

Writing is a solace.
WHY WRITE you ask>??? ...Well, for starters, it helps you release thoughts out of your head..and I don't know about you, but writing is FUN if you like the topic your writng about!(: It's an escape. A whole new universe that no one else but you can ever understand.. It's a way of openening up to people without ever meeting them. You don't need 1000 followers .. just ONE reader. That person looks beyond the grammer mistakes and the run on or 3 word sentences and just reads the words. Words speak your mind and your soul comes out of you. To write is to live in your own dreams of what makes sense to you, and not what makes sense in general. WHO CARES! Its not being graded and handed in,,,its being read and understood. A paper and pen can do SO much, a whole new world can come out.

Kandee Johnson !!!!

The most genuine, inspiring, loving, and happiest person on the internet :D
She's UNIQUE, BOLD, ORIGINAL and FUN!!

I read her blogs everyday, and each day i do, a lil more of me is soaked up into the Kandee fever she has speard! Her kindness kills the hate all around. Her name Kandee fits her perfectly because she's the CANDY to everyones day who reads/watches/ or meets her in person!!

Insecurity takes over!!

WHAT!? So before today, i never thought i was insecure. Maybe because i was oblivious to what insecurities were really all about.. It can be your looks, weight. I dont feel overwhelmed with either but im not gonna lie, BOTH popped in and out of my mind once in a while. But then i realized sometimes i think i'm not good enough....aand VOLIA!!! Insecurity #1 on my list. I'm insecure of becoming insecure...I'm insecure of feeling like a nobody and just a head and body walkin around. That's me alright. Nothin i'm proud of being, but glad i can finaly see it so i can knock it down with a blow to the pipe !!!!
I discovered that insecurities will stay with us until the day we kick it out of our systems and tell ourselves that we are AMAZING no matter WHAT! It's all in our heads!!! It's a feeling that comes from deep down, but we know that if we think differently about ourselves then they will start to disappear. No bad thoughts can reach you without your consent for it to...So don't feel over powered by those stupid worries. If we think positive, then what insecurity can touch us??? NONE CAN! ZEROOO. I think being a lil insecure is just part of being a human. Daily life and worries of failure, appearence, school and what people may think of you. But its just a mind trick in our heads that our insecurities are what makes us who we are, but in reality its our own fear being tied down.
Being confident is the most attractive trait in anyone...not concealer. Not covering up what makes you the most insecure of all. Accepting a part of you... like a birthmark on your face that you can't stand to look at in the mirror,but others seem to think is beautiful and can't imagine your face any other "unique" kind of way...or your crocked teeth that makes you hide away from the most confident thing you can flaunt (YOUR SMILE) but you hate it, even though it's not as bad as you may think..and actualy looks kind of cute. A smile..no matter what it may look like will ALWAYS be beautiful.

Milly ~~

The ONLY one who knows every single detail of everything about me.. and listened to all of my complaints..and knows what my dreams are..Who TRULY knows me more than i even know my self..
is Milly. :)

I found one of my 5th grade school notebooks and i used to write stories in it all the time for writing.. Hahahah :) It was like a diary thing only my teacher reads and grades it.

One of them was this: (word for word)

My Bear Milly
"Three years ago, in Cristmas, me my mom and dad and my brother Skylar went to the mall to eat lunch for cristmas.
After we ate, we were looking around the mall for a gift for me and my brother. We looked in a store called Bild-a-bear. My eyes shined up as i saw this bear that was as cuter then anything in the world. I wanted to get that bear so much that i cried for it. I was only 7 years old anyway. My mom had to get it for me. I stuffed her, i put a hart in her, made a wish that said.."I wish this bear would be a live." but of corse it wouldn't ever come "alive".
I pick out her clothes for her to wear. The last thing i had to do was to name her "Milly". I screamed "I'll call her Milly!"
As we came home to put Milly in a safe spot so "coco" my dog won't get it again like what she did to my first bear Twinkle. Me and Milly have a lot of feelings for each other. We have sad feelings together. Most of the time when i made at my brother Skylar, me and milly talks to each other.
She is very important to me because when I lost her in California with my cousins, I cried until i had her. My aunt sent her in a big envolpop. I started crying agin when i got her.
I would feel very sad if i had lost her. I wouldnt have any thing to hug if i had lost her, even if she was the one who got lost. She's my little sister in my imagiation in my bear family."

:)))

Letter to Heaven

Hi there Mr. True Love ..

I dont know exactly who u r...but i know u exist somewhere in the world.
I think about you when i go to bed..and moments when i feel hope is inside of me to find you. Im still young and ive honestly never fell in love with anyone yet...

I know from observation that love can be the most stressful and hard thing to deal with. Especially if you care about the other person very much..but some other things get in the way of dealing with the realationship you have..

But Love can also be the most wonderful and magical thing there ever is :) Which is why everyone craves that love feeling... to hold and kiss .. Love is the only ractional act that makes sense.

As people..with a heart that pounds, and a pulse that moves....
We deserse that feeling of fullness in our heart when we are in love.

I think it can happen when everything comes together and you love yourself before anyone can make there way into the dark tunnle and finds you<3

For me..I want YOU Mr.True Love ...

cuz u are the only person in this entire world that will make my body filled with a bubbly mess of happiness and romantic wonders..

Isnt that our mission in life??
To find our soul mate and spend every internal moment together in heaven..? I dont know if thats my wishful thinking or not but...

i like to think its true. ( :